When life gives you lemons, squeeze them into a cup of warm water first thing in the morning! lol Tomorrow is the big day! My weigh in day! I am nervous to step on the scale but it's more of an excited nervous. I haven't weighed myself since the 2nd and I have been kicking butt since then. We will see! I hope to have lost at least 4 pounds but I know from experience to not get my hopes up lol so I will be happy with anything as long as I've lost something! I just can't wait to shake off this 15 pound Holiday gain! My Mom called me earlier with an incentive; she said for every time I walk to and from her house she will give me $5! She said I can make up to $150 a month if I were to do it every day. Who could turn that offer down?! Today I made $5 :-) She has been so awesome through this process. She is my biggest fan. I don't know what I would do without her. It was in the 40's today so it was a nice walk. I still might do a basement workout tonight. I didn't get a good sleep last night so we will see. I had my lemon water this morning and then made myself oatmeal and a cup of green tea for breakfast. For lunch I had a frozen meal and for dinner I am going to have sweet potato fries. I am on my 6th cup of green tea and stil have a little over half way to go on my 75oz water jug.
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I know reading about what I eat everyday can get old but I do it for me so there, ha! I had 2 eggs with 2 slices of wheat toast for breakfast with green tea. I decided to pan steam my eggs with a lid instead of flipping them. It's been a while since I have made them this way and as good as they came out I need to make them this way more often. I had my lemon water first thing when I got up. I am on my 5th cup of green tea and have a little less than half of my water jug to go. For lunch I had a sandwich and for dinner I had a thin sirloin steak with green peppers, onions & mushrooms. I did a great basement workout last night and still have yet to workout today but I will before bed. My Mom is amazed that she can already notice me losing more weight since I have been back on my daily exercise/diet routine. It feels good when someone notices! Even if it is just my Mom :-) I am so proud of myself for keeping it up! I am to the point again where I just do it and don't think about it. I haven't been snacking in between meals but I saw this recipe online for these things called "Smudgies" - They looked and sounded really good so I got stuff to make them. It's a low calorie, guilt free snack that I guess is supposed to feel like you are eating an ice cream sandwich. You take 2 ripe bananas and mash them up with chunky peanut butter. Then you take graham crackers and break them in half and start constructing your sandwiches by putting the banana mixture between 2 graham cracker squares. After you do that you freeze them and then enjoy! I will be making mine in a day or two. I am waiting for my bananas to get a little riper but I will let you guys know how they turned out. Here is the recipe I am going off of: SMUDGIES I will be going grocery shopping again this weekend so I am hoping to get back to eating more vegetables/fruits. In the beginning the only thing processed I would eat was lean cuisines and I didn't eat them as often as I do now. I have taken the easy way out by having my diet to be mainly soups/frozen meals. Granted I still stay within my daily calorie limit I would like to eat more fresh made meals. For breakfasts I want to make these egg muffins on a whole wheat english muffin with a slice of american cheese. I saw an easy way where you make a bunch of them and then freeze them. I also have been having the taste for chili so I looked online and tweaked a recipe to my liking and will be making a batch of turkey chili for the first time. I hope it turns out good! I have never worked with ground turkey yet so I am excited to see if I can even tell a difference. I am thinking I will make the chili sometime next week. <-- My new background on my phone. I know there shouldn't be a "D" at the end of like but it's there lol. I got into reading my blog from the beginning last night. I have been meaning to do it for some time now. It is just what I needed. I have no idea where I have lost myself with all of this but I need to remember who I was when I started. Instead of finding myself like I had originally wanted I ended up going further and further away from just that. I don’t know how or why I blocked some things out but once I started losing weight I just got rid of the old me completely. I forgot about the annoying heat rash I had to put up with on my face for over a month and the nasty blisters I got on my feet. I completely blanked out every hard step it took me to get started. I wrote off everything. It wasn’t easy and I still struggle to this day! I thought I would be further than I am now but somewhere along the line I got off course. For a while it seemed for everything that would go right another thing would go wrong. But after wondering why… I realized for the millionth time it is all about your mindset. You can talk the talk but you have to be able to walk the walk. They say to never look back but in my case I feel it was needed! I can’t wait for spring/summer. I am starting to think about the garden I would like to have. I always want to do one but am always too late into the season and say “next year!” – I hope to at least grow green beans and tomatoes this year. My Mom has a good garden every summer so I have back-up veggies to pick if mine don’t go right lol just kidding Mom ;-) I had my lemon water first thing this morning, blah blah blah haha. I made myself a cup of coffe and a fried egg sandwich with a sice of american cheese on wheat bread for breakfast. I had a frozen meal for lunch with 2 slices of wheat toast that I baked with garlic. I am going to have a can of Healthy Choice soup with some oyster crackers for dinner. I still have yet to work out today but I have plans to later on. I had a great basement workout last night. I pushed my time to 35 mintues instead of 30. I have been full of energy lately, I love it! Since I have been working out again I have not only noticed that I have a lot more energy but my mood and mobility has also increased. I have been feeling great. I woke up and had my lemon water first thing. I then made oatmeal and had a cup of green tea for breakfast. For lunch I had a can of Healthy Choice soup with some saltine crackers and for dinner I had a sandwich. I am almost done with my water jug and have had 6 cups of green tea. I still have yet to workout but I plan to do a basement workout before bed. I am excited for my future. I have been thinking a lot lately about how I will feel once I get to my goal weight. I still am bigger and I hate it but I have been forcing myself to only think positive thoughts. I don't know why I always concentrate on the negative but the more I exercise and eat right the more I will be happy with myself and that is the most important thing in life. If you don't love yourself you will have a hard time getting anywhere you want to go. I just got back upstairs from a basement workout. This morning it took me a little while to get with the program. I didn’t have my lemon water but I made myself a cup of green tea and had 2 eggs and 2 slices of wheat toast for breakfast. For lunch I had a can of Healthy Choice soup with some saltine crackers and for dinner I had a baked pork loin fillet with baked sweet potato fries. I have had 5 cups of green tea and am almost done with my water jug.
Last night I did a basement workout and still have yet to workout today. I still have plans to later on. I had my lemon water first thing this morning and then made oatmeal and a cup of green tea for breakfast. For lunch I had the same kind of sandwich as yesterday but with no pickle lol. I had a frozen meal for dinner. I left myself room today to have a snack of a granola bar but have yet to have one. I have come in a little under 1,200 calories today. Some days I find it so hard to stay within 1,200 calories and others I am trying to get at least 1,000 calories! Not having enough calories a day isn't good for you either. I am on my 4th cup of green tea and am a little over half way with my water jug. I am so curious to weigh myself but I think I can make it until Friday lol. I'm scared to but yet I know I have lost something these past few days. I can just tell! I also have been doing weight training so I might have built up some more muscle. Nothing too new today. I have been enjoying my weekend :-) <--- I did a great basement workout last night and I taped these motivational sayings on my treadmill. They do help! They will be my trainer barking at me when I want to give up. Today is my 4th day back into the swing of things and you can already tell I have lost weight in my face. Face fat is first to go! I knew I had gained weight over the Holidays because I could not only feel it but also saw my face getting fatter. My face thinning is just proof that what I am doing is working and it also motivates me to keep on, keeping on! Michael can notice too! It is a good feeling. When I was off my diet/exercise I noticed I felt like crap after I would eat like crap. It is amazing on how much your diet/lifestyle can affect your mood/behavior. I saw myself going back to having no confidence and being insecure as ever. I know I have to build back up what I just tore down. I get mad at myself but then I just have to remember I am human and the only thing that matters now is that I am currently headed in the right direction and that I AM EXCITED ABOUT IT. I have not weighed myself since the 2nd and I am not sure when I will weigh in next. I'd like to wait until next Friday but I might not be able to wait that long lol. I made Michael a pepperoni pizza yesterday for dinner and I wanted a piece so bad but I was tough and stayed strong! I have been doing a great job with not munching AT ALL, staying within my calories and not eating past 7PM. Today I woke up and had my lemon water and then made myself a cup of green tea with oatmeal for breakfast. For lunch I had a turkey sandwich on wheat bread with a pickle, lettuce, american cheese & mustard. For dinner I have plans to make baked sweet potato fries with a baked breaded pork loin. I use a tablespoon of ranch dressing for my sweet potato fries and a tablespoon of barbeque sauce for my pork. I am on my 5th cup of green tea and am half way through my water jug. I have been using a really handy app on my phone for counting my calories and I just saw that I am able to share my chart. I will be posting my calorie charts for each day at the end of each post; even on my cheat days! The ONLY things I do not document are green tea/water. Speaking of cheat days; I will still have them on Fridays. Today I am not going to have a cheat day because I have not been back into this for a full week yet. I am going to try and pull through as long as I can without a cheat day but by next week I will give myself the option on Friday. I have plans to do another basement workout tonight. I wanted to get into going ice skating this winter but after looking for my hockey skates and not finding them i'm pretty sure I sold them in one of the rummage sales we have had.
Earlier yesterday I had asked Michael to not snack in front of me anymore. Last night he wanted to munch on something and he jokingly said “don’t you have to go in the basement and workout?” - I had no plans to workout yesterday but for some reason him saying that made me go you know what…I think I will. The next thing I knew I was putting on my socks and sneakers at 10PM. I did a full 30 minute workout. Half of it was on the treadmill and the other half was weight lifting/leg lifts. I kicked butt too. I usually just walk at a fast pace when I am on the treadmill but I consistently jogged for the first 10 minutes and pushed myself when I was most uncomfortable. I came back upstairs feeling great and in the end it worked out for the both of us, lol! Today is going good. I woke up and had my lemon water and then made myself a cup of green tea with oatmeal for breakfast. I used my last avocado and made guacamole again and had it with the rest of the tortilla chips for lunch. For dinner I am going to have the leftovers of rice, mushrooms & onion from yesterday. I am on my 3rd cup of green tea right now and am half way through my 75oz water jug. I have not yet worked out today but I plan on it. I feel I am back off to a great start. I am excited to be making progress again. I just have to keep and it up and before I know it I will be where I want to be. It may seem like forever now but there will be a day when I will look back and it will only feel as if I had blinked. Living day to day; not dwelling on the future or the past. Since I have lost 80 pounds I have gained 15 pounds of it back from this Holiday season. I weighed in today and am now back to being 273 pounds. My total weight loss now is 65 pounds down. I have 35 more pounds to go until I will have lost 100. I am sitting here right now with my will power in full effect. I want to munch on something but I decided to write my blog & drink some water instead. Today has been a good day. I drank a cup of warm water with a half of a lemon squeezed in first thing this morning. I then made myself a cup of green tea and had oatmeal for breakfast. Right now I am on my 8th cup of green tea and only am about half way through my water jug. I will have it finished by the time I go to bed. For lunch I made fresh guacamole again with some tortilla chips. I counted each chip as I ate them so I wouldn’t go over my limit. Once they are gone I will be staying away from any kind of chips. For my guacamole I take one avocado and mash it up with about 2 tablespoons of salsa. For dinner I had mushrooms and onions mixed in rice with a little bit of soy sauce. Weird I know but I had to use the mushrooms up. I have not snacked on anything else. I have been keeping track of my calories today to a "T" on my phone. I am trying to keep my daily calorie intake to 1,200. Today I have had a total of 1,227 calories. I am proud of myself; I made Michael bacon & Macaroni and cheese and I did not take one single bite of anything. It was a great way to test my will power. The more I stay strong like that the better my will power will get. I feel I need to reset myself with this whole process. So far; so good. As for exercise…I did not work out last night & I have not worked out today. I have no excuses besides the fact that I am being a big baby. I liked my horoscope for today: Pisces - Jan 02, 2013 - You took on a large challenge recently, thinking that it would change your life for the better. You didn't really have a choice - you had to take on the challenge, but you did so admirably and with great commitment. But now you are here in the face of reality, and it isn't as easy as you hoped it would be. You can't give up, because others are depending on you - and you also owe it to yourself to do your absolute best. You need to maintain the sense of hope that you had initially, and soon things will begin to become much brighter. I have just been one big mess. I have come to the realization that I need to start over. My plan is to go back to the beginning and start fresh. I have not weighed myself in a while and I KNOW I gained. My Mom and Michael both have noticed. I have no idea how much but I know I will not be happy. I am going to weigh in tomorrow morning and from there I will be keeping a close eye on my weight and will be doing weekly weigh ins. Day 1 of 2013 is going good but I am still a little rocky. I have completely thrown all of my routines out of the window these past few months. I am in the process of getting myself back into the swing of things. This morning was hard. I got up and had a cup of coffee. I have not had any green tea today or my lemon water but tomorrow those both will be back in full effect. The only thing I have really kept up with has been my water jug. I started taking my apple cider vinegar tablets again with my meals and also started back on taking my daily Centrum multivitamin. I did not eat breakfast right away and had a hard time getting with the program. I had a late breakfast/lunch of pea soup and for dinner I made some guacamole with tortilla chips. I made Michael a pepperoni pizza and had 2 pieces. I have also had 2 nature valley granola bars and have been snacking on these yogurt covered raisins I got. My first week back I am focusing on getting myself of a schedule. I need to completely cut out all of my old eating habits that I have gotten back into. Tomorrow I am going to start back on the lemon water first thing in the morning and then I will eat a healthy breakfast right away. I am also going to get back into the habit of using my calorie counter on my phone to keep better track of my daily calories than just in my head. I also am going to drink at least 5 cups of green tea a day. As for exercise… I still have yet to work out today. I am dreading it because I know it is going to suck. It is almost 6PM and I am having a hard time motivating myself. I want to get back on my schedule with daily exercise. 6 days on - 1 day off. I need to re-do what I have already done. I have come to terms with this and am going to try to do exactly what I did in the beginning of my journey. Baby steps… It’s like trying to walk up to pet a wild animal; if you move to fast you will spook it! I don’t want that to happen to me because I know if I don’t go at my own pace the stress of trying to get back on track too fast will sabotage me. It’s like I blinked and the past few months have flown by. I kept making excuses and kept saying I will get back on track next week...tomorrow. Before I knew it; it’s 2013. If I would have just sucked it up and did what I had to do I would be 100 pounds down right now. I need to remember this the next time I want to come up with an excuse. UNTIL TOMORROW… |
My name is Marilyn and I am 27 years old. I have been overweight for most of my life and on May 1st, 2012 I weighed in at 338 pounds. This blog is about my weight-loss journey.
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